I used to work in a start up full of martyrs who refused to take a lunch break and it was infuriating. I always took my lunches (as is my right) and one day the CEO went on this rant about how all the workers who took lunch breaks didn't really care about the success of the company.
Also, I'm confused/distracted by the LinkedIn post. I can't tell if "Health and Well-Being Hours" are official billable hours offered by these companies or if she's using this phrase just to refer to her time outside of work. Hoping it's the former, since applying corporate jargon to personal time sounds insane.
That start-up sounds horrible. CEOs like that never inspire loyalty. They inspire walkouts.
I took the "Health and Well-Being Hours" to be her oddly formal way of saying personal time. I agree, though; if that's what it is, she's farther down the corporate sinkhole than she realizes.
When they finally quit being martyrs and find work life balance - guaranteed they will post a long dull missive on LinkedIn about what everyone should know about finally finding how important that first goal was. They act as if its a discovery, something no one else knows and parade this newfound knowledge with all the relevant hashtags.
And the rest of us nod and politely like their post all the while thinking "but we've known that for years", that's why we are at the gym or the game or at the doctors.
“I rearrange my schedule around what is needed for work. I've never considered it something that is crossing my boundaries. Has that made my life difficult over the years? Absolutely, yes. Give and take. I have given more than I've taken though, this is true.”
Guilty and I've been in Martyrdom as a business owner. Working 24/7 weeks on end like it was something to be proud of. I did this until my body said no more. It made the decision for me not the other way around. I was proud and I felt invincible at the time. I still wrestle with guilt for not being busy. I've had to let go and learn to set my own boundaries
I appreciate your humor as always, but I feel called out 😉
In my opinion, it’s not the same thing if you work for yourself. You weren’t trying to impress colleagues or a boss with displays of busyness. You were trying to run a successful business. VERY different. But I’m glad you listened to your body and slowed down however you needed to. It’s very easy to be swept away and keep on go-go-going!
This is great Chris and I'd love to comment more but I'm in back-to-backs all afternoon. It's so sweet that you found the time to write this though. I'm so jealous!
Favorite line: "Missing her child’s first goal is a small price to pay for being able to use that fact to make her team feel guilty. I don't miss this world.
Higher ed's special examples of this include: midnight marking benders, to be the first into faculty office with a smug pile of scripts and a disappointed face that co- marker's scripts *aren't ready yet*; volunteering for extra duties at every open day, exhibition opening, graduation ceremony, distinguished lecture and what have you; applying for every grant going and becoming project director of six overlapping projects employing batches of postdocs and juniors and having 300 per cent of your time somehow accounted for on the spreadsheets. Oh! Then the old favourite - "there's nobody this year to teach the first years on library skills, anyone willing to volunteer and we'll remember the extra hours next year and make it up" - ( an eternal lie) - "me, me, me, meeeeeeee, I'll do it!".
Love this so much. My favourite image was the placental laptop stand. These are the people retirement kills OR they become total bellends on community committees.
HYSTERICAL! Would it be inappropriate to post this in Teams chat? I just want to see which coworkers say, "I WISH I HAD TIME TO READ THIS! MAYBE AT A RED LIGHT!"
Another great article, Chris. Of course, *we* all understand the reality. "These people" like to look busy, and more so, tell everyone how busy they are, but they spend way too much of that "busy" time scrolling through LinkedIn articles, ordering online food deliveries, and playing solitaire.
Thanks, Ofifoto! If they spent as much time being busy as they do talking about being busy, they’d have a lot more free time. I’m not sure what I just said. I may have just torn into the space-time continuum with that one.
Exactly! The time it takes them to write those linkedin posts and comments is time they could have used for something else. I knew someone like this who was always busy yet he achieved almost nothing compared to others.
Fair point. We constantly communicate across space and time. I am, after all, in the future. But even more confusingly, I’m sure all the corporate martyrs wish we wished everyone was as important as they think they are.
APPLAUSE, please, as the sign lights up in the studio. That's in case the audience doesn't know how great the performance and performers are. I have maintained for years that work/life balance is a myth, perpetuated by those you describe who work hard and want every to know how hard, how long, how crazy. It's life, folks, with work as part of life, forget the balancing act. That's for jugglers and unicycle riders in the circus. When people choose how to spend, invest or waste time they may forget they bear the responsibility for the choice. I don't believe you can waste time. You use it. You may try and ignore it, you may abuse it or lose track of it. Oh, and before I forget it, those people (gotta love that phrase) also think mistakenly they are capable of multi-tasking. The research from Stanford years ago exploded that myth as well.
💯 we choose how we spend our time. Something tells me that the people who claim to be very busy are spending an inordinate amount of time on social media.
I love your perspective on this, Gary. You’re right—you don’t waste time, you choose to use it in specific ways. It’s a responsibility. I’m also glad that you brought up the research on multi-tasking. Too many people still operate under the delusion that their brains are supercomputers, able to perform multiple complex tasks at once. Everyone I’ve met who’s claimed to be a good multi-tasker was abysmal at it.
It's rather amusing to me. When I was in the workaday world full time and someone said to me, "I didn't have time......" You can fill in the blank. My flip response and I had to be careful when and how I used it and with whom, was, "I didn't notice you had less time than anyone else." Then, depending on the response, the conversation might have included we chose to do something else rather than the other thing. Choices reveal priorities and preferences, like now. Thanks, Chris.
You see this all the time on LinkedIn - it's why I dislike anything and everything 'corporate' 🙄
It's gross, isn't it?
I used to work in a start up full of martyrs who refused to take a lunch break and it was infuriating. I always took my lunches (as is my right) and one day the CEO went on this rant about how all the workers who took lunch breaks didn't really care about the success of the company.
Also, I'm confused/distracted by the LinkedIn post. I can't tell if "Health and Well-Being Hours" are official billable hours offered by these companies or if she's using this phrase just to refer to her time outside of work. Hoping it's the former, since applying corporate jargon to personal time sounds insane.
That start-up sounds horrible. CEOs like that never inspire loyalty. They inspire walkouts.
I took the "Health and Well-Being Hours" to be her oddly formal way of saying personal time. I agree, though; if that's what it is, she's farther down the corporate sinkhole than she realizes.
Fun piece.
I have to run, I’m up to my eyeballs with house kids although they are adults. Is there such a thing as a mother dome?
I never gave myself to a corporation, but I certainly was instilled with self imposed hypervigilance.
Once I saw what it was all about, I was able to undo it. Pretty chill now doing what I want.
When they finally quit being martyrs and find work life balance - guaranteed they will post a long dull missive on LinkedIn about what everyone should know about finally finding how important that first goal was. They act as if its a discovery, something no one else knows and parade this newfound knowledge with all the relevant hashtags.
And the rest of us nod and politely like their post all the while thinking "but we've known that for years", that's why we are at the gym or the game or at the doctors.
This is so spot on, Mwila. You nailed it.
“I rearrange my schedule around what is needed for work. I've never considered it something that is crossing my boundaries. Has that made my life difficult over the years? Absolutely, yes. Give and take. I have given more than I've taken though, this is true.”
Oh, she is so close to getting the point…
Right? It’s like she wa figuring it out in real time as she was typing and had to stop.
Guilty and I've been in Martyrdom as a business owner. Working 24/7 weeks on end like it was something to be proud of. I did this until my body said no more. It made the decision for me not the other way around. I was proud and I felt invincible at the time. I still wrestle with guilt for not being busy. I've had to let go and learn to set my own boundaries
I appreciate your humor as always, but I feel called out 😉
In my opinion, it’s not the same thing if you work for yourself. You weren’t trying to impress colleagues or a boss with displays of busyness. You were trying to run a successful business. VERY different. But I’m glad you listened to your body and slowed down however you needed to. It’s very easy to be swept away and keep on go-go-going!
I was trying to impress myself! Lol. No, really. Prove something to myself.
That makes sense
Great piece! I admit to be a former Martyr in a Fortune 50 company. Cringe.
Thanks, Anne Marie! It’s great that you can now say “former”!
This is great Chris and I'd love to comment more but I'm in back-to-backs all afternoon. It's so sweet that you found the time to write this though. I'm so jealous!
Hahahaha amazing, Caroline. I wish I’d remembered to use “I’m in back-to-backs.” It’s such a perfect phrase for this.
Love how the women love to one-up the HyperMasculine, Dude Core, Just Do It Dudes.
They really do! It’s something to behold.
Favorite line: "Missing her child’s first goal is a small price to pay for being able to use that fact to make her team feel guilty. I don't miss this world.
Thanks, Rona! I can't wait for the day when I'm able to say I don't miss that world either.
Higher ed's special examples of this include: midnight marking benders, to be the first into faculty office with a smug pile of scripts and a disappointed face that co- marker's scripts *aren't ready yet*; volunteering for extra duties at every open day, exhibition opening, graduation ceremony, distinguished lecture and what have you; applying for every grant going and becoming project director of six overlapping projects employing batches of postdocs and juniors and having 300 per cent of your time somehow accounted for on the spreadsheets. Oh! Then the old favourite - "there's nobody this year to teach the first years on library skills, anyone willing to volunteer and we'll remember the extra hours next year and make it up" - ( an eternal lie) - "me, me, me, meeeeeeee, I'll do it!".
It's nice (and horrifying) to hear that this syndrome extends into academia, Caroline. That sounds PAINFUL.
Every organisation was captured by this, I reckon. Horrible, yeah
Love this so much. My favourite image was the placental laptop stand. These are the people retirement kills OR they become total bellends on community committees.
Ha, thanks Ros. I'm glad you liked it--and I completely agree!
HYSTERICAL! Would it be inappropriate to post this in Teams chat? I just want to see which coworkers say, "I WISH I HAD TIME TO READ THIS! MAYBE AT A RED LIGHT!"
OMG that's perfect! You can always say you sent it accidentally because you were frazzled from trying to do too many things at once.
Another great article, Chris. Of course, *we* all understand the reality. "These people" like to look busy, and more so, tell everyone how busy they are, but they spend way too much of that "busy" time scrolling through LinkedIn articles, ordering online food deliveries, and playing solitaire.
Thanks, Ofifoto! If they spent as much time being busy as they do talking about being busy, they’d have a lot more free time. I’m not sure what I just said. I may have just torn into the space-time continuum with that one.
Exactly! The time it takes them to write those linkedin posts and comments is time they could have used for something else. I knew someone like this who was always busy yet he achieved almost nothing compared to others.
It’s really an interesting skill set isn’t it? The act of being busy while accomplishing nothing.
Fair point. We constantly communicate across space and time. I am, after all, in the future. But even more confusingly, I’m sure all the corporate martyrs wish we wished everyone was as important as they think they are.
Couldn't have said it better myself.
APPLAUSE, please, as the sign lights up in the studio. That's in case the audience doesn't know how great the performance and performers are. I have maintained for years that work/life balance is a myth, perpetuated by those you describe who work hard and want every to know how hard, how long, how crazy. It's life, folks, with work as part of life, forget the balancing act. That's for jugglers and unicycle riders in the circus. When people choose how to spend, invest or waste time they may forget they bear the responsibility for the choice. I don't believe you can waste time. You use it. You may try and ignore it, you may abuse it or lose track of it. Oh, and before I forget it, those people (gotta love that phrase) also think mistakenly they are capable of multi-tasking. The research from Stanford years ago exploded that myth as well.
💯 we choose how we spend our time. Something tells me that the people who claim to be very busy are spending an inordinate amount of time on social media.
Yes! And on the weekends, posting about how busy they are at home too.
I love your perspective on this, Gary. You’re right—you don’t waste time, you choose to use it in specific ways. It’s a responsibility. I’m also glad that you brought up the research on multi-tasking. Too many people still operate under the delusion that their brains are supercomputers, able to perform multiple complex tasks at once. Everyone I’ve met who’s claimed to be a good multi-tasker was abysmal at it.
It's rather amusing to me. When I was in the workaday world full time and someone said to me, "I didn't have time......" You can fill in the blank. My flip response and I had to be careful when and how I used it and with whom, was, "I didn't notice you had less time than anyone else." Then, depending on the response, the conversation might have included we chose to do something else rather than the other thing. Choices reveal priorities and preferences, like now. Thanks, Chris.
Mind if I steal that line? It would come in handy with certain people!
Steal away, be careful and in the spirit of telling the truth, have fun.
Will do!
Ecxuse my typos, I'm typing this with my nose becuase I'm double-fisting redbulls after 24 horus without sleep!
Hahahaha clearly you’re a very busy, important woman! I appreciate you taking time out of your overbooked schedule to read this!