Amazing essay for all the writers out there! The subjectivity of rejection is not often talked about. This was a very comforting essay for me to read as well. Looking forward to reading more of your work!!
Great advice, Chris. Having taken three years of high school Latin, I can translate your lead art back into Latin: “Illegitimi non carborundum” - my dad told me years ago that it was an old law firm saying (at least, within his firm) - I have a commemorative coffee cup emblazoned with the Latin phrase.
Love your voice (written and verbal)! Also, the Paris Review it just sent me a rejection. I assume it had something to do with their reading it on a Monday. Yeah.
Yes. Yes. Yes. As you point out, it’s so built into us from a young age to trust that our caregivers and people in positions of power and authority know what is going on and to be deferential. I mean in some ways, as a small child you may have to believe that. But, a lot of times that coding is still in us to defer to others perceptions over our own. This is all so well done. Well researched and so funny. 🙏🏼
Thanks so much, Kaitlyn! That’s the perfect way to put it—“that coding is still in us to defer to others’ perceptions over our own.” Little by little, we end up overriding that programming. Hopefully.
Great piece --- and a great reminder that nobody has a clue what they are talking about. Thank God for that. For neither do I. The internet quote just blew me away.
Love this, Chris! Great examples to remind ourselves not everyone knows what they are talking about and not everyone's opinion is worth taking to heart. I laughed out loud at fist fight and home address!
This is hysterical and yet, so wise! I try to impart similar sentiments to clients in therapy all the time, but it never sounds this enjoyable lol. Definitely saving this to share (and maybe print and tack on the wall in front of my computer).
This reminds me of a feature in Anne Kadet's early newsletters—she used to find and quote one-star reviews of things like WAR AND PEACE, the Grand Canyon, and Central Park.
I had a friend break his arm recently. One doc said he’s fine with a cast, the other said he needs surgery with pins. It’s literally one of the most common and timeless injuries, and yet two totally different recommendations from doctors. How?
He went the no surgery route, but ended up not having a choice– it happened in April 2020 so he couldn't get into the hospital, so now he has a f-ed up Covid break.
This is why I stick in my lane and only voice my own opinions that I know beyond all doubt are true. Like the fact that spaghetti is way overrated. Surely no one will argue that.
It sounds like you're reading my therapist's notes back to me, which I think is some kinda HIPPA thing. Matthew, I can only hope that before the end, you're able to find your way to the truth in life that is being antipasta.🥁
Thanks, Kristi! I also saw a quote from Charlie Chaplin about how movies wouldn’t last. Crazy, right? Oh, and a swirlie…you stick someone’s head in a toilet and flush. It’s like the adolescent version of waterboarding.
Amazing essay for all the writers out there! The subjectivity of rejection is not often talked about. This was a very comforting essay for me to read as well. Looking forward to reading more of your work!!
Thanks so much, Yashraj! I'm really glad you enjoyed it.
Listening to Sousa marches as I read. I feel so empowered. Watch out, world. Here comes the band!
That'll get your blood pumping!
Thanks, Bill! I love it—a t-shirt with that emblazoned on the front may be in my future.
Great advice, Chris. Having taken three years of high school Latin, I can translate your lead art back into Latin: “Illegitimi non carborundum” - my dad told me years ago that it was an old law firm saying (at least, within his firm) - I have a commemorative coffee cup emblazoned with the Latin phrase.
Love your voice (written and verbal)! Also, the Paris Review it just sent me a rejection. I assume it had something to do with their reading it on a Monday. Yeah.
Thanks, Felicia! Of course it was because it was a Monday! Either that or the editor choked on a croissant earlier in the day and was still shaken up.
Yes. Yes. Yes. As you point out, it’s so built into us from a young age to trust that our caregivers and people in positions of power and authority know what is going on and to be deferential. I mean in some ways, as a small child you may have to believe that. But, a lot of times that coding is still in us to defer to others perceptions over our own. This is all so well done. Well researched and so funny. 🙏🏼
Thanks so much, Kaitlyn! That’s the perfect way to put it—“that coding is still in us to defer to others’ perceptions over our own.” Little by little, we end up overriding that programming. Hopefully.
🤞🏼🤞🏼
Great piece --- and a great reminder that nobody has a clue what they are talking about. Thank God for that. For neither do I. The internet quote just blew me away.
The internet quote shocked me too. It’s like we’re all just bluffing our way through, you know?
Love this, Chris! Great examples to remind ourselves not everyone knows what they are talking about and not everyone's opinion is worth taking to heart. I laughed out loud at fist fight and home address!
Thanks, Cherie! I’m glad you liked it!
This is hysterical and yet, so wise! I try to impart similar sentiments to clients in therapy all the time, but it never sounds this enjoyable lol. Definitely saving this to share (and maybe print and tack on the wall in front of my computer).
Wow, thank you so much, Amber! If you think it could help (or entertain) someone else, that would be incredible.
This reminds me of a feature in Anne Kadet's early newsletters—she used to find and quote one-star reviews of things like WAR AND PEACE, the Grand Canyon, and Central Park.
Ha, that sounds great
Love your pov and the quotes! Well done!
Thanks, CK! I'm glad you liked it!
Chris, really great article. It is so easy to beat ourselves up. We certainly don't need to let outsiders do it!
Thanks, Matthew! I really appreciate that!
I had a friend break his arm recently. One doc said he’s fine with a cast, the other said he needs surgery with pins. It’s literally one of the most common and timeless injuries, and yet two totally different recommendations from doctors. How?
That's pretty crazy. Which one did your friend decide to listen to?
He went the no surgery route, but ended up not having a choice– it happened in April 2020 so he couldn't get into the hospital, so now he has a f-ed up Covid break.
Oh man. That sucks!
This is why I stick in my lane and only voice my own opinions that I know beyond all doubt are true. Like the fact that spaghetti is way overrated. Surely no one will argue that.
Rick, I was hoping we might someday be friends but your views on spaghetti are profane. What say you about pickles?
Pickles are bangin’, spaghetti be stankin’
- Ralph Waldo Emerson (and me)
I am concerned about some of your life choices here Rick but I respect your right to be wrong.
It sounds like you're reading my therapist's notes back to me, which I think is some kinda HIPPA thing. Matthew, I can only hope that before the end, you're able to find your way to the truth in life that is being antipasta.🥁
It's such a disturbing take, isn't it?
How dare you, sir. That’s impastable.
I don't even know what a swirlie is.
This was full of super interesting quotes. Who would've thought that nobody predicted TV would be what it is. All of these are great!
Thanks, Kristi! I also saw a quote from Charlie Chaplin about how movies wouldn’t last. Crazy, right? Oh, and a swirlie…you stick someone’s head in a toilet and flush. It’s like the adolescent version of waterboarding.
Oh shit. Yeah that sounds about right for school 😕
Thanks so much, Shawn!