Even More Things I Don't Understand: A Singalong
Another batch of bafflements
It’s been two years since I last put to music things that confuse me. An update is long overdue. Let’s sing.
To the tune of My Favorite Things by Richard Rodgers & Oscar Hammerstein II.
UFC matches are held at the White House Sexting with chatbots instead of your own spouse Everyone’s trying to become a brand These are a few things I don’t understand
Face treatments involving the sperm from salmon Is anybody still playing backgammon? Dead species spawned from a DNA strand These are a few things I don’t understand
Autistic children who are telepathic Half of our lives seem to be spent in traffic Why must I sunburn before I am tanned? These are a few things I don’t understand
People claiming AI writing As their own is sad I wish I could fathom this one single thing Then I wouldn’t feel so bad
Women are horny for gay hockey players Every street has 16 coffee purveyors Australian spiders as big as your hand These are a few things I don’t understand
UFOs, aliens—when is disclosure? Kanye West’s wife’s going to die from exposure Too many chargers for every doodad These are a few things I don’t understand
Two-factor authentication is murder When you get old you turn into a birder Waymos that drive people though they’re unmanned These are a few things I don’t understand
Here on Substack Algorithms Tend to drive you mad I wish I could fathom this one single thing Then I wouldn’t feel so bad
What’s something you don’t understand? Share it in the comments.
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This is the “Buy Me a Coffee” link, only I don’t need more coffee.
You're the most fun guy I know. I think you might want to consider adding an Advice & Ethics tag. "Dear Mr. Stanton." I see you becoming a powerful source for good in the Substackisphere. What do you think?
This was delightful. Major props for rhyming "gay hockey players" with "coffee purveyors."