60 Comments
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Bill Southern's avatar

I’ll bet he didn’t try to use the app in the drive- thru.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

🤣

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Shelley Durga Karpaty's avatar

and damn now I have to try those fries! I went through the drive thru recently and got a Frosty for the first time in years. I used to pay $1.08 and now it’s over $2! Still enough change in my car to not make it a transaction that my husband will see. “You went to Wendy’s?!”

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Chris Stanton's avatar

I hope they live up to the hype! Please don't blame me if they're just okay; my experience with them is limited to one location. I did have a Frosty last night, though. Never disappoints! Except for the price.

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Shelley Durga Karpaty's avatar

It’s the light bulb that goes on when you realized you were the audience not a person in a conversation that did it for me. Great piece describing daily living with the underlying tones of dismay and disappointment. Acceptance.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Thanks, Shelley! There are so many people who just want to talk at you rather than to you. It's astounding.

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Amanda Jaffe's avatar

So glad you chose to get salty with this one, Chris! Everyone on my train is wondering what's so funny....

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Hi, Amanda. I'm glad I could make your train ride more entertaining! Thanks for reading—I always appreciate it.

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Tina Neidlein's avatar

“I…okay” I said. Nailed it.“ So funny. And if you don’t end up using “A Bag of Grease and Regret” as a memoir title, mind if I steal it?

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Chris Stanton's avatar

It's yours. Please consider "A Bag of Grease and Regret" my gift to you.

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Tina Neidlein's avatar

Coming back to say: *exquisite* title 🤌

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Thank, Tina! And thanks for reading!

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Ernie Schenck's avatar

The best breakfast burritos since the craft service food truck at my first TV shoot in LA. Not sure how they did it on account of, you know, Wendy's but there it is.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

I’ve been reluctant to try it for obvious reasons, but maybe I will now.

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Mo__'s avatar

Brilliant! So enjoyable. TY for taking us with you on your lunchtime walk!

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Thank you so much, Mo!

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E. Bee's avatar

I was just thinking I should have made my kids get jobs in high school. One graduated with a 4.0 from college and the other just dropped out. I’m convinced my parenting or lack thereof sometimes is responsible for both of those results. But back to the far more important point- the fries. I only order a frosty and fries at Wendy’s a couple of times a year and this just happened yesterday! And my fries had zero salt! I felt like something was really wrong. Did they forget? Do I need to ask for salt from here on out?

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Chris Stanton's avatar

So crazy that this coincided with your semiannual Wendy’s trip. Now, WTF is with them depriving you of your salt? I mean, even if it wasn’t sea salt, you should at least be able to see salt. That’s bullshit! We must go to the same terrible Wendy’s. I hope you didn’t try to pay with the app.

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E. Bee's avatar

I did not try to pay with the app! I went through the unintelligible drive through and paid with cash of all things!

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Cherie Lee's avatar

LOL! Chris, you need a Chick-fil-A in your neighborhood. They ask if you're paying with the app before you even order your food.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

That is EXACTLY what I need, Cherie!

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Wendy Varley's avatar

“I spanked my kids,” he said. “They turned out fine. They both make over $200,000 a year. One manages an Apple Store and the other’s a chemist.” Cause and effect, see? I didn't spank my kids and one's a poet. Serves me right.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

You reap what you sow, Wendy. If you’d only known.

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Kristi Keller 🇨🇦's avatar

I don't know how you managed to turn a conversation with a grumpy old man into a post I read in its entirety. This was hilarious. The app part tho. Did you ever get to use the money you loaded on there so long ago?

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Thanks, Kristi! It took a VERY long time, but I did eventually zero out my balance on the app. Luckily, I didn’t put too much money on there to begin with.

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Renee Fountain's avatar

And now I understand the need for "Flippy"... it's a fry flipping robot... no joke, I wish it was. I received an article on how investing in it is a good idea as it's poised to go national... I included the link if you want to check it out. I for one would prefer to order from a robot because as you learned, talking to a Gen Z--if you can get their attention-- is rarely productive and I tend to get hangry.

I think White Castle has them... or one... I don't go to White Castle... I believe they should have a breathalyzer on the door and you need to be THIS DRUNK [insert 2x legal limit for state] to open them.

https://www.cnn.com/videos/business/2021/11/02/flippy-2-miso-robotics-fast-food-kg-orig.cnn-business

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Chris Stanton's avatar

You know, with all the challenges the world is facing right now, it’s heartening to know that engineers are using their skills to invent fry-flipping robots. And your idea for White Castle is spot on. Taco Bell may need that too.

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Renee Fountain's avatar

That’s a good point about where the focus is—I think it’s like that for a lot of things.

I also agree with you about Taco Bell. Though I vote for it to only be 1.5 times the legal limit.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

I think it’s like that for a lot of things too. The change to 1.5X seems reasonable for Taco Bell. But for Denny’s anytime after midnight it should probably be 3X.

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Renee Fountain's avatar

I can agree with Dennys after midnight. That rule is to protect you from yourself, rather than the food. It’s only times like that when I get fries with cheese AND turkey gravy. It’s an absolute spud abomination.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Hahaha Moons over My Hammy was always my downfall

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Linda Mueller's avatar

Hysterical-laughing out loud. Love the “get the app” button at the end.😉

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Thank you, my friend!

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Good Humor by CK Steefel's avatar

OMG. Have you ever seen this man before? The Wendy’s in your backyard? You must send this piece to Wendy’s corporate. Hehe.

PS I have never been to a Wendy’s. But after reading this I feel I have.

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Never saw him before. I’ve been wondering where he lives, because he has to be within walking distance. If you ever do decide to visit a Wendy’s, do yourself a favor and don’t download the app first.

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Tom Pendergast's avatar

Everybody’s got an app … but who knows how to use ‘em?

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Chris Stanton's avatar

THAT is the key question!

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Jane Deegan's avatar

😂 Hilarious! I was picturing him walking through the drive thru. (I think I saw him the other day).

I can't remember the last time I went to a Wendy's. I think they have square burgers or used to. Chick-fil-A rules!

Great title by the way

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Thanks, Jane! They do have square burgers! I actually tried to walk through that drive-through once a long time ago and was turned away, so this guy must have really made a nuisance of himself. And I agree wholeheartedly about Chick-fil-A. So good.

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Jane Deegan's avatar

Walk thru drive lol. I keep thinking of the Beavis and Butthead episode where they did that. Yes, I am a 10 year-old boy

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Chris Stanton's avatar

Hahaha aren’t we all

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